Life as we know it

As another blessed year comes to a close, it's hard not to reflect on all the things God has blessed us with in 2013.  It's also a time to think a little into the future, not to plan as we have learned, but set some goals for ourselves.  As I sat with Derik the other day at dinner, I asked him what some of the things he was wanting to accomplish in 2014 were.  His answer stumped me, and left me with nothing else to say.  "Babe, I don't think a year ahead, I think a day ahead.  You should know this by now."  - well okay then ;) This is true when it comes to our life.  We have to wake up everyday thanking God for giving us another day, and a healthy day at that. I guess I am more of the planner in the relationship so yes, it's only natural of me to think into the future, a little.  Sorry babe. :) Before we move into the new year, I thought I would reflect a little on what God has provided us with, blessed us with, and taught us in 2013.  It has been a wonder

This entry will be dedicated to our sweet girl who we expect to arrive in May.  Ill add pictures to it every few weeks...enjoy :) We used this picture to surprise family when I was ten weeks. 18 weeks. The size of a sweet potato. I am finally over my sickness, and have energy back. 21 weeks. The size of a papaya.  I might as well live in NE, because all I want to eat is meats, potatoes, and bread!

Zoie and I were lucky enough to spend six straight days with Derik over Christmas.  He has to go back to work tomorrow, and I'm not sure we will know what to do with a quiet house.  Just wanted to share some of our favorite Christmas moments with you.  Remember, Christmas is a day, we don't always have to celebrate it on "Christmas" but a little before and a little after works too. We ate yummy cinnamon rolls for Christmas Eve morning.      We got to attend a beautiful Christmas Eve service this year.  Singing Silent Night is my all time favorite!     My Christmas gift     Hanging out with Auntie Laura on Christmas Eve.     Zoie did so well Christmas Eve opening presents.  She loved pulling the paper out of the bags!     It was really tough to get a good family picture with everyone :)     Christmas morning....Luckily we got some good pictures in and a few presents opened before Zoie had a rough day.

We have had quite the week, luckily we are getting it all over with before Christmas. Zoie loves playing on the floor, and would 24.7 if you let her. She got her foot caught under the bathroom door, then rolled and her foot stayed put. Ouch! She cried for a minute then wanted to keep playing. After being up all night and constant crying the next day, we took her into the doctor. She got her legs, ankles, and feet x-rayed. She is so good with stuff like that. She just lays there, puts her hands behind her head, and lounges. Nothing was broken, just a torn ligament . Thank goodness. Im not sure how Zoie would handle a cast ;-) Last night, we were doing a vest treatment for her Cystic Fibrosis and she was doing fine with it. After we were done, she started wheezing really bad and changed color. She was having what seemed like an asthma attack. By the time 911 showed up, her breathing was better. Im so used to her seizures, we weren't quite sure how to handle a breathing malfunction.

I am going to make this short and sweet, because it's kinda hard for me to still talk about, but the reason I do this blog is to answer people's questions, let you into our life a little bit, and for myself.  It's something besides praying I do to get stuff off my chest, put it on paper, or in this case on a computer screen, and then move on. As most of you know, our family had a very hard few days in and out of ER's and trying to figure out what was going on with our little Zoie.  She has seizures, but only one of two every two to three weeks.  They are manageable, but of course we are always trying our best to stop them for good.  It's a work in progress. On Tuesday morning, Zoie woke up crying.  If you were here every morning with her, you would know something was wrong.  Zoie doesn't wake up crying, she wakes up rubbing your face saying "dada." She is the happiest kid you will meet, even after all she goes through.  By 10 that morning, she had ha

I am the child who cannot talk. You often pity me, I see it in your eyes. You wonder how much I am aware of -- I see that as well. I am aware of much, whether you are happy or sad or fearful, patient or impatient, full of love and desire, or if you are just doing your duty by me. I marvel at your frustration, knowing mine to be far greater, for I cannot express myself or my needs as you do.You cannot conceive my isolation, so complete it is at times. I do not gift you with clever conversation, cute remarks to be laughed over and repeated. I do not give you answers to your everyday questions, responses over my well-being, sharing my needs, or comments about the world about me.I do not give you rewards as defined by the world's standards -- great strides in development that you can credit yourself;   I do not give you understanding as you know it. What I give you is so much more valuable -- I give you instead opportunities. Opportunities to discover the depth of your character, not

Romans 8:28-And we know that for those who love God, all things work together for good, for those who are called according to His purpose. For the last few months, I have memorized this verse, read about it, prayed about it, and counted on it.  Depending on what you have going on in your life, you probably interpret this verse differently than I do, but I think we can all apply it to our lives at some point.  Derik and I met with several doctors back in February down at University Hospital in their in vitro clinic. We knew we wanted another baby or two, but after lots of genetic testing, we also knew that we were both carriers of the Cystic Fibrosis gene, and the Microcephaly gene.  With that in mind, we had a 25% chance of having a baby that could end up with either of these genetic disorders.  We had our mind made up, we would do in vitro, with our sperm and egg, but make sure the ones that got implanted had neither genetic disorder.  Our mind was made up until they told us it woul

Being a parent of a kiddo with CF, means being an advocate; an advocate for Zoie, and for everyone else who has this disease.  This means sharing with people, teaching people, helping raise money for research and a cure, and being a part of anything that comes in our path that has to do with Cystic Fibrosis.  Sometimes we all get so caught up in "life" we really forget what's important.  Im guilty of it, and so is Derik.  We get caught up in finances, and what to wear, or what we should do on a Sunday.  Life goes so quick, I sometimes am even guilty of forgetting for a few seconds that my daughter has daily struggles because of her Cystic Fibrosis, and right now it's my job to do anything in my power to help her. Last night Derik and I got to be a part of a glamourous, heart warming, and humbling evening surrounded by Cystic Fibrosis families.  Derik had an employee (high up) who works in the insurance department for Enterprise come to him about a year ago and start

We are headed home after lots of driving to and from Denver and seing lots of the best doctors for Zoie . This was a very long awaited appt with the feeding clinic at Children's A, that included a speech therapist, dentist, GIVE doctor, regular doctor, OT therapist, .... and probably some more that I am forgetting. What a fantastic team though! Yesterday we went down all afternoon for a conference and swallow study. I am so proud at how well Zoie did eating in front of four doctors, a huge machine, while watching daddy, perched up on a very high carpet all while mommy fed her. She chewed, swallowed, and drank lots of fluid. Praising God a million times right now because the doctors saw no form of aspiration, saw no choking, and internally, Zoie was perfect! No need for surgery, and absolutely for now, no reason to not keep feeding her. This morning we sat down and went over all these results and what we can now move forward with. As we sat down, the first thing out of the doct

I am that girl who has to watch the Bachelor/Bachelorette every season, and no I don't get sick of it ;)  My husband probably does.  He is a good sport though, so every season, it's wine and tv on Mondays at the Cissell's.  This last season, a guy named Drew had a sister who was severely disabled and she was actually part of one of the shows.  As the dad of Drew and the sister was talking to the Bachelorette, he asked her if she believed in angels.  She replied, "well, yeah."  He then asked if she had ever seen one.  Anyways, where I am going with this, is that the dad of the special needs girl was under the full impression, and no one was going to change his mind, that she was an angel put here on Earth to change many people's lives.  As Derik and I watched this episode, we just shook our heads and had tears coming down our faces.  Special needs kiddos/adults are angels.  You don't have to believe Derik or I, or this girl's dad, but if you walked for

It's hard to believe we are already half through July!  Where does the time go???  Summer's are always the best time of year, but yet they go the quickest. We were able to make it up to V Smith Park a few weeks ago to get Zoie's two year pictures done, and of course we scheduled them right when she figured out she has an underbite.  This was quite an issue when you are trying to get her to do her oh so lovely smile, and she keeps sticking her lower teeth out instead.  Little ham.  Anyways, here are some of our beautiful family pictures that Miss Angie Carman with Carmanphotography.com took :)   I still can't fathom that we have a two year old.  Once again, where does time go??  I am always telling Derik that I wish we could freeze time right here, right now.  I LOVE this stage in our life.  Zoie has been doing so well with her therapies.  I have had a lot of people ask me if she is crawling yet, or walking.  The answers to both are no.  Zo